Which Way? (Part III): Personal Integrity

Better is the poor that walks in his integrity, than he that is perverse in his lips, and is a fool. (Proverbs 19:1)

Last week we discussed our “spiritual integrity”, our integrity as it relates to the spiritual relationship we have with God, and how it drives (or should drive) everything that we do. We asked ourselves two Key Questions:

1. Are you being honest with yourself?
2. Do you really believe that what you believe is really real?

Today we will be discussing our “personal integrity”, our integrity as it relates to going through life and relating to other human beings. And the main point I want to make from the start is this: if our spiritual integrity is intact and in sync with what Jesus did and taught, our personal integrity will take care of itself! But since we probably aren’t perfectly there yet, let’s discuss some practical matters that we need to be mindful of as we go through life. Let’s start again this week by looking at our words, or more accurately, our “word”, as in being people of our word. How does God view His “word”?

I will worship toward your holy temple, and praise your name for your loving kindness and for your truth: for you have magnified your word above all your name. (Psalms 138:2)

This verse states that God magnifies His word (meaning His speech, His words, His commandments) above His name (His character, His reputation). We could phrase it like this: if you take care of what you say, keeping your word, to a large degree your reputation will take care of itself! The Bible is full of verses about keeping your word – let’s look at one such passage from Deuteronomy:

When you shall vow a vow unto the LORD your God, you shall not slack to pay it: for the LORD your God will surely require it of you; and it would be sin in you. But if you shall forbear to vow, it shall be no sin in you. That which is gone out of your lips you shall keep and perform; even a freewill offering, according as you have vowed unto the LORD your God, which you have promised with your mouth. (Deuteronomy 23:21-23)

Once you make a vow or a promise, it is critical, it is required, that you perform it. To not perform it is sin. This sounds harsh in this day and age when declaring bankruptcy is considered a “right”; when nearly every high profile athlete who has a good year demands to “re-negotiate” their contract; when politicians change their positions to follow the polls. After all, don’t we all need to be “looking out for number one”? What does The Bible say?

LORD, who shall abide in your tabernacle? who shall dwell in your holy hill? He that walks uprightly, and works righteousness, and speaks the truth in his heart. He that backbites not with his tongue, nor does evil to his neighbor, nor takes up a reproach against his neighbor. In whose eyes a vile person is contemned; but he honors them that fear the LORD. He that swears to his own hurt, and changes not. (Psalms 15:1-4)

Look at this last sentence – “He that swears to his own hurt, and changes not”! That is the way that a Godly person honors his word. Let’s repeat it as today’s Key Point Number 1: Keep your word, even when it hurts!

Let’s be aware that the commitments we make are truly that – commitments, not just noble ideas or good intentions! Let’s remember that how we keep our word will go a long way in determining our personal integrity, and the reputation that we have before others.

Let’s continue to ask ourselves the tough questions - are we dealing with people honestly in all areas of our relationships with them? Or are we following the “world’s” ways when it comes to trying to get what we want? I’d like to share some personal experiences of mine in this area, as I’ve had some battles in this area, and I know how strong the temptations are. Let me first point out – I am not perfect in this area, and I am not trying to say I do everything right. As a matter of fact, a lot of these battles occurred because I wanted to make things happen, and at the time I wasn’t so interested in maintaining personal integrity. But when God’s Holy Spirit lives inside of you, He won’t let you rest when you are considering doing something that is wrong (and that is a very good thing)!

Example 1: Back when I was running my business, I was talking with the “business coach” that my franchisor had assigned to me. He told me that in order to close more sales I needed to “guarantee a 500% increase in profits” to my prospects. That statement took me by surprise, since it struck me as something that would not only be unattainable, but it would be out of my control – how can I guarantee any increase in a company’s profits? So, I asked for clarification on what he meant by making a “guarantee” – did he mean that I promise to give back my client’s money if they didn’t increase their profits? He was surprised that I would even ask the question, and he told me “you just tell it to your prospect to make the sale, and don’t worry about it after that”. That was the point at which I knew I had signed up with the wrong franchisor, or at least I was talking to the wrong business coach.

We’ll summarize this as today’s Key Point Number 2: Don’t make promises that you can’t guarantee to keep! And how can we best do that? Let’s look at what Jesus taught, regarding the verses we read from Deuteronomy:

Again, you have heard that it has been said by them of old time, You shall not forswear yourself, but shall perform unto the Lord your oaths: But I say unto you, Swear not at all; neither by heaven; for it is God's throne: Nor by the earth; for it is his footstool: neither by Jerusalem; for it is the city of the great King. Neither shall you swear by your head, because you can not make one hair white or black. But let your communication be, Yea, yea; Nay, nay: for whatsoever is more than these comes of evil. (Matthew 5:33-37)

Let’s move into another area of personal integrity, what I will call “transactional” relationships:

A false balance is abomination to the LORD: but a just weight is his delight. When pride comes, then comes shame: but with the lowly is wisdom. The integrity of the upright shall guide them: but the perverseness of transgressors shall destroy them. (Proverbs 11:1-3)

So, do we try to trick people into giving us what we want? Do we overcharge them for a product or service? The answers to these questions seem obvious as we sit in our Bible Study classroom reading from Proverbs, but do we apply them as we go through life? Here’s a question that one of my mentor’s asked me, and I’ll ask it to you all. I realize that it might be difficult for those of you that never worked in sales to relate to, but it really does come into play in nearly all of our lives at some point in time. Here’s the question: How do you sell a defective product? I’ll wait here as you think of some answers…

Some folks are probably saying that you highlight the positive features, and/or you focus on the needs that it will still fulfill for the customer, or other such practical answers. But here’s what my mentor suggested, and which I fully believe is scriptural: You DON’T! You either get the product fixed, or you find a different, non-defective, product to sell!

Example 2: I had to deal with this exact issue as I was contemplating closing my franchise business. I was struggling with selling our services to clients, knowing full well that the suppliers of the franchise would not be able to meet the needs of my clients. That is when my mentor and I had our discussion on how to sell the defective product, and I chose to attempt to fix things by providing the services myself. And to a certain degree that worked, as I was able to get things done at a price point that my clients were happy with, and within the timeframe that was necessary to meet their needs. But it left me with no time to spend with my family, which was the main reason that I had decided to leave the job that I had before I started the business.

Example 3: So, as a result, I decided to close the business and take a job elsewhere. But this left me with a dilemma – I had this franchise that on paper had some value that I could sell. The world would tell you that you go ahead and find a buyer, and get back whatever money that you can. But I KNEW it was a defective product, and I had absolutely NO peace about attempting to sell it to someone else. Thankfully, God provided another franchisee, already involved with the business that wanted to expand his territory, so I just signed my franchise over to him (he agreed to take over my franchise fees in exchange for being able to provide services in my geographic territory).

So, you say you don’t own a business or sell any type of product? You want to know how does this lesson apply to you? How about selling a house? I love this old episode of the Andy Griffith Show, where Andy is considering selling his house and buying another person’s. And we see all of the parties attempting to hide, mislead, or subtly lie about flooding in the basement, and cracks in the ceiling, and other defects. But it ultimately concludes with everyone agreeing to not sell the houses, and to get the defects fixed instead.

So, let’s conclude our lesson about personal integrity with Key Point Number 3: Do the right thing! And let me be specific – do that which is right in God’s eyes, not the world’s – after all it will keep you healthy:

And said, If you will diligently listen to the voice of the LORD your God, and will do that which is right in his sight, and will give ear to his commandments, and keep all his statutes, I will put none of these diseases upon you, which I have brought upon the Egyptians: for I am the LORD that heals you. (Exodus 15:26)

Join us next week for our lesson entitled: Our Declaration of Dependence.

If you have been blessed by this lesson, and would like to sow where you have been fed, you can make a tax deductible donation to Cornerstone Church using any of these methods:

1. To make a one time donation through PayPal, click here.
2. To Partner with us through a regular $25/month subscription through PayPal, click here.
3. To send a donation by check, mail it to:

Cornerstone Church
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Naperville, IL 60563

Visit our main site at http://www.sharethelemonade.net/

Which Way? (Part II): Spiritual Integrity

Better is the poor that walks in his integrity, than he that is perverse in his lips, and is a fool. (Proverbs 19:1)

We have been studying about God’s Economic Plan, and seeing how God’s plan for our economic prosperity differs from what the world presents. Last week we moved on from that study and started looking having a “good name”, a “good reputation”. Let’s review the three Key Points:

1. There are only two ways to do anything: God’s way, and the Wrong way!
2. Methods matter!
3. Motive is everything!

We concluded that we needed to be doing everything God’s way, motivated by love for Him and for His people.

Today we are going to continue teaching in this direction, as we take a look at “walking in our integrity”. Actually, we are going to break this lesson into two parts. Next week we will look at our “personal integrity”, our integrity as it relates to going through life and relating to other human beings. Today I want to look at our “spiritual integrity”, our integrity as it relates to the spiritual relationship we have with God, and how it drives (or should drive) everything that we do. Let’s start by looking at some definitions for the word “integrity”:

Webster’s Definitions:

1. the quality or state of being complete; unbroken condition; wholeness; entirety
2. the quality or state of being unimpaired; perfect condition; soundness
3. the quality or state of being of sound moral principle; uprightness, honesty, and sincerity – SYN see HONESTY

My Practical Definitions:

1. Being the same when nobody is looking as you are when somebody is looking.
2. Being the same when only God is looking as you are when other humans are looking.

When it comes to spiritual integrity, my second practical definition applies. Let’s remind ourselves of this key passage:

Where shall I go from your spirit? or where shall I flee from your presence? If I ascend up into heaven, you are there: if I make my bed in hell, behold, you are there. (Psalms 139:7-8)

We need to be aware at all times that no matter where we are and no matter what we are doing, God is with us and watching us. We can’t hide from Him and we can’t fool Him (you can fool all of the people some of the time, and some of the people all of the time, but you CAN’T fool God) – we CAN deceive ourselves, but we can’t deceive God. And if we realize that God is always watching we’ll find a better place to make our bed! So, today’s lesson is going to be one that challenges us. To do this, we are going to ask a series of key questions instead of stating key points. And why is this? Because it is too easy to just say that you are good:

Most men will proclaim every one his own goodness: but a faithful man who can find? The just man walks in his integrity: his children are blessed after him. (Proverbs 20:6-7)

So, let’s start with today’s Key Question Number 1: Are you being honest with yourself? The Bible tells us to find out:

Examine yourselves to see whether you are in the faith; test yourselves. Do you not realize that Christ Jesus is in you—unless, of course, you fail the test? (2 Corinthians 13:5 NIV)

The Bible gives us some tests that we can conduct, as we examine ourselves:

This then is the message which we have heard of him, and declare unto you, that God is light, and in him is no darkness at all. If we say that we have fellowship with him, and walk in darkness, we lie, and do not the truth: But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship one with another, and the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanses us from all sin. If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. If we say that we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us. (1 John 1:5-10)

Are we saying one thing and doing another? Then the truth (God’s truth) is not in us! When I think of “spiritual integrity”, I think of our actions being consistent with our words, and our words being consistent with our actions, no matter where we are and no matter who we are with. Let’s ask ourselves some more questions, and let’s be honest with ourselves:

• Do you speak and behave one way in church, and a different way at home? Humans have this strange tendency to be nicer to strangers than they are to their immediate family. If you behave differently in church than you do at home, then you are lacking in spiritual integrity. As you examine yourself in this area, ask yourself: are you are being honest with yourself?


• Do you speak and behave one way in church, and a different way at work? People can talk of honesty in church, but then lie and deceive to get ahead at work. If you behave differently in church than you do at work, then you are lacking in spiritual integrity. As you examine yourself in this area, ask yourself: are you are being honest with yourself?

And here’s my personal favorite when it comes to examining ourselves:

• If you were arrested and accused of being a Christian, would there be enough evidence to convict you? Keep in mind, just going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than going to McDonalds makes you a Big Mac! Ask yourself, and be honest with yourself: Are you producing good fruit?

Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves. You shall know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes of thorns, or figs of thistles? Even so every good tree brings forth good fruit; but a corrupt tree brings forth evil fruit. A good tree cannot bring forth evil fruit, neither can a corrupt tree bring forth good fruit. Every tree that brings not forth good fruit is hewn down, and cast into the fire. Wherefore by their fruits you shall know them. Not every one that says unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that does the will of my Father which is in heaven. Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in your name? and in your name have cast out devils? and in your name done many wonderful works? And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, you that work iniquity. (Matthew 7:15-23)

So, it is important that we be consistent in our words and actions, in order to bring forth good fruit. But beyond that, let’s ask ourselves another key question, which I take from Del Tackett from The Truth Project (http://www.thetruthproject.org/): Key Question Number 2: Do you really believe that what you believe is really real?

Let’s spend some time thinking on this question, because if we really do believe it, it will show in everything that we do!

• Do you really believe that The Bible is the inspired Word of God? (2 Timothy 3:16) Then you will read it and study it! If you are not actively reading it and studying it, do you really believe that what you believe is really real?


• Do you really believe that Jesus is who He said He is, the Son of God? (John 10:30) Then you should be living your life in obedience to everything that He told us to do! But if you aren’t seeking to know Him, if you are not growing in the grace and knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ, do you really believe that what you believe is really real?


• Do you really believe that Jesus is the ONLY way to have eternal life with God, and to avoid eternity in hell? (John 14:6) Then you should be telling your loved ones about Him! I realize that this is an area that we need to be "wise as serpents and harmless as doves" (Matthew 10:16) – I have done some harm as a new Christian by trying to force the truth on people that I love. But if you are not sharing Jesus with people, do you really believe that what you believe is really real?

I realize that this type of lesson can make you feel like a failure, like you are not measuring up. But I want to encourage you that if it IS your desire to love and to serve Jesus, and if you have made the commitment to Him as your Lord and as your Savior, HE will complete the work in you:

Being confident of this very thing, that he which has begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ: (Philippians 1:6)

Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which does so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us, Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God. (Hebrews 12:1-2)

And if you have examined yourself, and you have honestly determined that you haven’t ever made a personal commitment to Jesus as your Lord and Savior, do it now! The Bible says

For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord. (Romans 6:23)

If you shall confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus, and shall believe in your heart that God hath raised him from the dead, you shall be saved. … For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved. (Romans 10:9 & 13)

You can have a personal relationship with Jesus, a relationship that transforms you here and now in this life, and also results in eternal life with Him in heaven for ever! Just call upon the name of the Lord, and you shall be saved! (For a more complete explanation of God’s Gift of Salvation, go to www.sharethelemonade.net/2394.html, and when you make a commitment to Him make sure that you tell someone that can rejoice with you!)

So, let’s establish and maintain our spiritual integrity, so that everything that we say and everything that we do is consistent with being a Christian, consistent with being like Christ!!

Join us next week as we examine our Personal Integrity.

If you have been blessed by this lesson, and would like to sow where you have been fed, you can make a tax deductible donation to Cornerstone Church using any of these methods:

1. To make a one time donation through PayPal, click here.
2. To Partner with us through a regular $25/month subscription through PayPal, click here.
3. To send a donation by check, mail it to:

Cornerstone Church
1433 N. Main Street
Naperville, IL 60563

Visit our main site at http://www.sharethelemonade.net/

Which Way?

Seek the LORD while he may be found, call upon him while he is near: Let the wicked forsake his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts: and let him return unto the LORD, and he will have mercy upon him; and to our God, for he will abundantly pardon. For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, says the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts. For as the rain comes down, and the snow from heaven, and returns not thither, but waters the earth, and makes it bring forth and bud, that it may give seed to the sower, and bread to the eater: So shall my word be that goes forth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I sent it. (Isaiah 55:6-11)

We have been studying about God’s Economic Plan, and seeing how God’s plan for our economic prosperity differs from what the world presents. We embarked on that study because Jesus pointed out that how we trust God for financial needs was the least area, the starting point, for living by faith. Let me summarize by quoting a verse on what is even better than riches:

A good name is rather to be chosen than great riches, and loving favor rather than silver and gold. (Proverbs 22:1)

Today I want to start looking at having a “good name”, having a “good reputation”. We saw that God’s way for finances are at odds with the world’s way, and today I want to continue looking at this variance between God’s way and the world’s way. Let’s refer back to our opening verses from Isaiah chapter 55. In verse 6 we see that we are to seek the Lord – the Lord isn’t going to force Himself on us. Verses 7 through 9 point out that God’s ways are better than the world’s, higher to the same degree that the heavens are higher than the earth. Verses 10 and 11 point out that His ways go forth through His word, the same word that we seek and study through The Bible. As we get started today, let me make this real simple in today’s Key Point Number 1: There are only two ways to do anything: God’s way, and the Wrong way! And that is why it is critical for us to read and study The Bible. After all, let’s look at what we are called to do from Romans chapter 12:

I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service. And be not conformed to this world: but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God. For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man that is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly, according as God has dealt to every man the measure of faith. (Romans 12:1-3)

We are called BOTH to be a living sacrifice, giving up our will to God’s, AND to be transformed by the renewing of our mind. We need to be doing BOTH, renewing our mind through knowing God’s word and therefore His will, and yielding our will to His. And why is this critical? Because we will be tested constantly! Unless you are a hermit living alone, you will be tested, since it is in our human relationships that many of the battles occur. So let’s take a look at how we are to deal with these battles. Let’s start with one of Jesus’ teachings on dealing with issues between “brothers”:

Therefore if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has anything against you; Leave there your gift before the altar, and go your way; first be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift. (Matthew 5:23-24)

Does your brother have some issue against you? Have you trespassed against your brother in some way? Don’t expect your offering to God to be accepted until you reconcile with your brother first. How can we bless God if we have not been a blessing to our brother? What did John teach on this?

If a man says, I love God, and hates his brother, he is a liar: for he that loves not his brother whom he has seen, how can he love God whom he has not seen? (1 John 4:20)

Today’s lesson is our opportunity to examine ourselves, to see if we truly love God by seeing if we truly love our brothers (and sisters). What about the times when our brother trespasses against us? Jesus taught on this too:

Moreover if your brother shall trespass against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone: if he shall hear you, you have gained your brother. But if he will not hear you, then take with you one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established. And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto you as an heathen man and a publican. (Matthew 18:15-17)

Here’s today’s Key Point Number 2: Methods matter! How do we deal with a brother, when there is an issue? Step 1: go to your brother directly, alone. Try to address it out of the public arena, but openly and directly between the two of you. If that doesn’t work, step 2 is to take with you one or two people, but again out of the public arena and openly and directly with your brother. Only after that do you bring the issue before the church.

What is the opposite of this approach? How often do we come across gossip, things like “do you know what so and so did to me?” Stories spread from person to person accusing and condemning one individual and often that individual doesn’t even have a clue that they have offended the person! Or here’s another example: have you ever come upon two people talking between themselves, and as soon as they see you the conversation instantly stops? Later on you discover that you were the primary topic of their conversation, and that conversation was not of a constructive nature.

Examples like this are common in the world – we start to experience them as children, especially within nearly any school environment. As we get older, they tend to become more discrete, but in the world the use of “backroom” discussions and meetings to attempt to achieve a desired goal has in many ways become an art form. But we need to realize that the world’s ways are not God’s ways, and as Christians we need to follow God’s ways. And this means that we go to our brother, and discuss things honestly and directly. The word “transparency” is very prevalent in the media these days, due to the scandals that have rocked the financial and business world. As Christians, we need to be even more transparent in our human relationships – openly letting people know who we are and were we stand, not trying to hide, or mislead, or deceive, or manipulate in any way.

As in all things spiritual, and in all things relational, what matters most is the attitude of our heart. Let’s look at how Jesus’ disciples responded when they were informed of an offense that had not even occurred yet:

Now when the evening was come, he sat down with the twelve. And as they did eat, he said, Truly I say unto you, that one of you shall betray me. And they were exceeding sorrowful, and began every one of them to say unto him, Lord, is it I? (Matthew 26:20-22)

What was their response? “Lord, is it I?” What do you suppose the world’s way would be? Probably something like “I’ll bet it’s so and so – he seems like the betrayer type?” We see it in the news media constantly – speculation, innuendo, and accusation, even before all of the facts have been gathered. We need to be quick to examine ourselves first, to make sure that our heart is right, before going to address an issue with anyone. Let’s look at another teaching from Jesus:

And why do you behold the mote that is in your brother's eye, but perceive not the beam that is in your own eye? And how can you say to your brother, Brother, let me pull out the mote that is in your eye, when you yourself behold not the beam that is in your own eye? You hypocrite, cast out first the beam out of your own eye, and then shall you see clearly to pull out the mote that is in your brother's eye. (Luke 6:41-42)

One of the reasons it is so critical to be living by God’s ways, by His word, is because it will help us to know when there is a beam in our own eye. We need to constantly be renewing our mind through God’s word, so that we can see clearly. If we are not reading and studying God’s word, if we are not removing beams from our own eyes, we need to avoid trying to correct others – we’ll be doing more harm than good.

So let’s consider our human interactions, and how we handle issues between ourselves and our brothers. Let’s examine our hearts and our attitudes, and let’s make sure that we are handling things in God’s way and not the world’s. And let’s remind ourselves of one last Key Point Number 3: Motive is everything!

Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal. And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing. And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profits me nothing. (1 Corinthians 13:1-3)

You can do all of the right things, you can know all of the right things, but if you do not have charity (unconditional love), it is nothing. So let’s be learning God’s ways, and doing things God’s way, motivated by a love for God and for God’s people, and we will see God’s word living and working and prospering in and through our lives!

If you have been blessed by this lesson, and would like to sow where you have been fed, you can make a tax deductible donation to Cornerstone Church using any of these methods:

1. To make a one time donation through PayPal, click here.
2. To Partner with us through a regular $25/month subscription through PayPal, click here.
3. To send a donation by check, mail it to:

Cornerstone Church
1433 N. Main Street
Naperville, IL 60563

Visit our main site at http://www.sharethelemonade.net/